2018 NFL Picks Week 13: Road Trip!
Last Week: 4-11
Thanksgiving weekend was far from kind to us, and now I have a losing record to go along with unusually tight pants. We still have four weeks of picks to recover, and we’re going to start this week by taking a host of road teams. Let’s see if we can pop our heads back over the surface by joining the away side!
New Orleans Saints -8 at Dallas Cowboys
Dallas’s resurgence is misleading and the Saints have become a dominant team. That’s what I thought heading into this game, and the Cowboys’ defensive line teed off and ruined the New Orleans offense. Whoops.
Atlanta Falcons +1.5 vs. Baltimore Ravens
Baltimore has all of the advantages in this one, but they’re also running an offense based on quarterback rushing. Matt Ryan will make the Ravens play catch-up, and they aren’t ready.
Carolina Panthers -4 at Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Tampa Bay has nothing to play for and the Panthers need to win this game. Cam Newton and co. will roll.
Chicago Bears -4 at New York Giants
Daaaaa Bears are just a much better team in this matchup. New York playing “well” recently isn’t enough to make them even with an 8-3 team at home.
Buffalo Bills +5 at Miami Dolphins
Buffalo can play defense, and the Dolphins are starting either Ryan Tannehill or Brock Osweiler at quarterback. I don’t even care which one it is, Miami will struggle to score.
Indianapolis Colts -3.5 at Jacksonville Jaguars
Bortles has been replaced by Cody Kessler. The Jaguars won’t break 20 points, and Andrew Luck will.
Cleveland Browns +6 at Houston Texans
As weird as it may be to say, the Browns are a competent football team. The Texans have no business winning nine games in a row, so Cleveland shouldn’t have any trouble covering.
Denver Broncos -5 at Cincinnati Bengals
I can’t figure out why the Broncos have been good lately, but they’re at least a middling team. Von Miller and Case Keenum will be enouh to blow out Jeff Driskill (look him up) on the road.
Los Angeles Rams -9.5 at Detroit Lions
Wait why are the Lions less than 10-point underdogs against a top-tier team? This game should end 42-15.
Arizona Cardinals +14.5 at Green Bay Packers
Aaron Rodgers doesn’t want to play for Mike McCarthy anymore, and the 20th-ranked Packers’ defense won’t slow Josh Rosen down enough to cover more than two touchdowns. I love a three-point game listed as a 15-point game.
Kansas City Chiefs -15 at Oakland Raiders
The Raiders need to lose as much as possible to fulfill Jon Gruden’s vision of taking full control of the team. He can’t draft, so it’s going to go terribly, but in the meantime we can at least gamble against him.
New York Jets +7.5 at Tennessee Titans
Are we sure the Titans can score? I would take anyone with more than a touchdown to cover a spread against them.
Seattle Seahawks -10.5 vs. San Francisco 49ers
Let’s watch Russell Wilson tear the terrible 49ers apart. It’s going to be boring, but only because Seattle playing well has become boring at this point.
Minnesota Vikings +5.5 at New England Patriots
Way too many points for Tom Brady to cover against a good defense. Even if the Patriots get a lead, they’ll let the Vikings score in garbage time and make it close.
Los Angeles Chargers +3.5 at Pittsburgh Steelers
The Chargers are a legitimately good team, and missing a field goal to lose in heartbreaking fashion suggests they’ll lose by less than a field goal.
Philadelphia Eagles -6.5 vs. Washington Redskins
I learned last week that it’s a bad idea to count on Colt McCoy to score points. It’s going to be ugly.
That's all for this week! Kick back, grab a drink, and feel free to blame me if you put money on these picks and come out behind. I won't compensate you, but maybe your significant others will send their wrath in my direction instead of yours.